This is how I feel.

Old King Saul’s time is done. No, he wasn’t terrible. He helped the nation through a crisis, and for a time we were more united. But that didn’t last. And yes, maybe he was God’s choice, but then, maybe God was just giving us what we wanted: a leader who was “one of us”.

He started out promising. He had the right character. A good guy, charismatic, that sort of thing. But maybe he got a bit drunk with power. And maybe he looked for advice in the wrong places. He saw enemies where he should have seen friends. He saw the need for action when he should have chosen restraint.

This is where I am.

The gates of Hebron. David, ready to take his crown. But it’s hard to hear over the whispers, the people I love, I want to respect. “Didn’t he fight for the Philistines? He’s a Judahite, you know? He’s just good at motivating a small group of people. He isn’t really one us. He said he served Saul, tried to help out, but he was really a traitor. Have you heard what his priest did?”

They don’t want answers. I don’t want the questions. I want to celebrate, but it’s hard.

This is how I feel.

And, yes, maybe I won’t cry out in celebration. Maybe I just don’t have the guts. But I will be happy today, I will be hopeful. I will accept his leadership and be glad. And maybe I’m wrong, and maybe he’ll fail. Wouldn’t be a first time.

O, Saul, why did you only ever see enemies all around you?